June 2010
1 post
Update
Blah blah blah. Junior year ends this week. I made Varsity Cheer @ Vista Murrieta, but I’m not going there nexxxt year, I’m going back to Mira Mesa. Yeah, bitches, Celena Valenzuela is going back to Mira Mesa High School Senior Year. Look the fuck out for me! Haha. I’m coming back CUHS I WANNA GRADUATE THERE so don’t make up some bullshit. And I left for certain reasons...
January 2010
4 posts
BritneyLeAnn..
I miss you soo damn much.. You don’t know how much I need and want you ]: I miss my best friend. Blaaahhh… Things right at this moment are so damn gay Best…. It suuucks to know you’re an hour away ]:
I don't know.
Who to talk to. My boyfriend says talk to him when something’s wrong. But I can’t… not on aim. For the past days I’ve been generally happy. But hmm.. today things turned that around, and it brought back everything that’s eating me up insidde. My boyfriend’s talking to me on aim, like he doesn’t even give a fuck about me. It’s whatevers though....
Why.
Is my heart aching for you Russel? Sooo… I just found out that Russel, ex of 28 months is locked up… When I found out my heart dropped to my stomach.. Why is my heart aching for him? When he was out all we did was fight and argue, but now that I know he’s in juvenile hall I’m hurting and I yearn for him to hold me… Why did things happen the way they did.. I remember...
Goodbye 2009, Hello 2010
Hmm. It’s the 4th day of 2010 and so far it’s been pretty damn good. I ended ‘09 on a good note for the most part.. And the first day of 2010 was good. Spent it with…
December 2009
13 posts
Recaaap.
Mkay, so this blog is basically going to be about the past weekend to today. Well it is currently Winter Break, obviously, thank god for now school, but I still have hw -_- Friday was boriiing as fuuuck; of course. Saturday, Anjelica stayed over heyyyy! Ahaha, we talked till I fell asleep, then I started talking in my sleep ahaha. Funny shit. We moved onto the bed, and then she knocked out, and I...
8 More Days.
Till I’m in Mira Mesa again and with my Best Friend. I’m so anxious! I can’t wait. I have finals this week, I’m stressing on my Ap Bio final fuck… I needa write an essay for Ap English. I needa go Christmas Shopping. Sooo much to do. ]: I’m super excited to see Chino! I’m gonna give him the biggest hug ever. I’m even more excited to see Britney! She...
I think...
That it’s pretty fuckin ridiculous that I’ve been gone from Mira Mesa for over a month, and people still talk about me, and my business, old and new. Haha daaang get the fuck out my lifeeee.
Wufoo Question 06
u think hes an alright guy?
-Who Lewis? I can’t say cuhs I barely now him.
Wufoo Question 05
haha would you want to get to kno him?
-Honestlyyyyy. Noooo. I’ve got my mind set already and I’m not interested in getting to know other guys, but don’t be offended, I’ve told like 2 other people the same thing.
Wufoo Question 04
hahaha alright. uhh wat do you think of a guys named Lewis?
-Haha, uhm. Idk much about him. He was in my history class down in Mira Mesa, and he played football that’s pretty much it. Haha.
Wufoo Question 03
What race is the guy in mira mesa?
-Haha hmm. Secret [: Just know I’ve liked him since Summer, if you read my past blogs, shouldn’t be hard to figure out [:
Wufoo Question 02
Does he live in Mira Mesa?
-Wellll actually there’s two guys I like haha. One of em I’m indecisive about, and he lives up here in Temecula. And the other does live in Mira Mesa [:
Wufoo Question 01
Do you like anyone?
-As a matter of fact, yes I do.
...
It’s so hard not to want you… When I see you I just want you to just come over to me and be how we were… I loved it, and I miss it. I see you and I’m like woooowww…. What happened? I mean I understand everything that’s going on right now, I just hope there’s still a chance and what not. Imy. I really do ]:
Not as it seems..
Right when I think things are beginning to fall back into place they have a falling out before it can even settle. It sucks. I feel like I’ll never find anyone again. It sucks being fucked over repeatedly, or know when you’re aboutta be. The only person who understands is Britney, cuhs she knows EVERYTHING that I’ve been through and what I’m going through.
Intuition.
Once again my intuition was right. I knew something was going on, I tested it, and it was right. Why is it that each time I begin to like someone, an ex always comes back. Why? I’ve been fucked over too many times, and when I had a gut feeling that I was going to again, I stopped it before it could happen. I honestly don’t need anyone. But I want someone. There’s only one person...
Fuck Liking Someone.
Everytime I really start to like someone, the mother fucker always has another girl, or their ex is on their mind. Fuck the bullshit. I’m done tryna find a guy who’ll actually like me and not cuhs of my looks.
113009
Todaaaay was alriiiight I guesss haha. I got pissed off today.. But I learned that I can’t assume shit I have to verify it right away. I really misss Chino ]: he’s such a good Buddy, really he is.. He’s always there for me and always listens and what not. I could never ask for a better guy friend. I actually wore shoes to school today haha, my first time ever wearing shoes to...
November 2009
5 posts
Break.
Break overall was pretty damn boring haha. I actually enjoyed staying at my dad’s. I gotta new phone blah blah all that good stuff. I had a weird ass dream last night. I had a dream that I had a Monroe piercing, and I only had it for a week but I decided to take it out haha, and it hurt. And then this stupid Bulgarian bitch was telling on me for no reason -_- ahaha then I saw freakin Ros and...
Vannesa!
Idk how to talk on Tumblr hahaha. Text meeee! And I’ll tell youuuu [:
Hello.
Haha. I barely ever Blog. Hi Vreni and Vannesa! Thanks for following me! I miss you guys ]: Anywaaays. School has been really gooood. I don’t really feel new. I just miss Cheer ]: I still talk to my BFF Britney pretty much everydat, I’m glad we’re staying close! I’m visiting Mira Mesa this December! Woo hooo. So if you wanna kicket hit me up! Haha. I think I just wanna...
Ventilation.
So much has changed, along with happened. I’ve learned that things happen for a reason and you have to figure out that reason. I haven’t updated in the longest time, too much shit has happened.. I don’t Cheer anymore, or go to Mira Mesa.. Which depresses me.. I don’t even know where to start.. Actually, first off, I wanna say, I hope your bitch ass is happy that I’m...
October 2009
1 post
Lies.
I’m so tired of them. I hear them everyday of my life and I usually ignore it.. but I just wish people would come out and be real with me and tell me what’s going on. I’m tired of having to figure things out myself and put all of the pieces together. I can’t do it anymore. I know who I can trust, and that’s not many. I know who I can’t trust, and that’s...
September 2009
12 posts
Thoughts.
As I laid there I wondered what I was doing here. Why am I still involved.I found some stuff out…I shouldn’t be trippin because we aren’t together, but now that I know the truth, I feel stupid. Incredulously Stupid. I laid there crying and he was asleep so I couldn’t talk to him. Why am I where I’m at… I wish I had all the answers. Right now I’m full of...
Hm.
I’m tryna remember when I allowed myself to not be in control, if that makes sense. I was reading my past blogs during the summer, and I seemed pretty disfunctional and lost and sad and everything that’s negative. I can’t remember when I began to feel that way. I know I lost all control when Russel and I broke up. But I don’t remember when I let my emotions run wild and go...
Andrew Calderon [:
BUDDY [: I thought that I’d make a blog about him because he’s been a part of my life since like July. I just wanna thank you for always being there for me and always knowing how to make me feel better especially when I’m down. You always know exactly what to say to make me smile. We’ve had some rough times, and we’ve both said sorta mean things to each other, but at...
Britney Camacho
Thank you for being my Best Friend <3 You understand me more than anyone else does. I know I can count on you, and you’ll be there whenever I need someone to turn to. I’m glad we’ve gotten closer! We still have two years left! I love you B! <3 Haha.
So much...
Has changed. Good and Bad. It makes me kinda sad that it isn’t summer anymore. We’ve drifted.. and I miss how we were during the summer. Yeah I still see you everyday, but where did our feelings go? Why did they change, and why are you so different now. I wish you knew what you want, because I do… it’s freakin hard for me not to feel for you or not to want you, because of...
End of Summer.
Things are aboutta end on a good note. I’m cool with all the guys that I had tense feelings towards, bitches aren’t talking shit, at least I don’t think so. Junior Year babyyyy! Woo hoo. It’s gonna be an intense year [: I’m so excited! Haha. Yay for honors and ap classes [: I’m boutta get like a 4.5 haha I’m motivated!
“Maybe all men are a drug. Sometimes they bring you down and sometimes, like now,...”
– SATC (via quotewhore)
Varsity!
Our first game is tonight! I’m helllla excited [: I’m kinna trippin right now cuhs of some stuff that I thought I heard. I really needa start to go to tumbling, so I can get my Round off Backhandspring. Considering I throw my standing all by myself now, and now it just needs to be perfected. But I’m determined to fix it by next Wednesday [: Haha. I haven’t Tumblred lately...
I wonder what.
Keeps bringing him back to me, after I keep pushing him away, and keep telling him to go. Each time after I tell him to go, he ends up coming back… I don’t know why. I pity the girl that he’s fucking over, cuhs I’m the one he’s honest with. I sit here and laugh at her cuhs she doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing and what’s going on with him....
My Lifeeee.
Is back to where it was before all of the drama with guys occurred [: I haven’t Tumblred in like a week. There’s a grip that I did haha but I don’t wanna post it all up here. One more week till school starts, I’m hyped up for it. Me and AHEM made up hahah. He ended up texting me [: He keeps coming back -_- I don’t know why. I haven’t talked to Alan Dela Cruz in...
August 2009
72 posts
Alan Dela Cruz
Officially made my night
Tumblarity.
What the hell is the point of it?! haha. It’s retarded. So like I’m so confused with how I feel. Sometimes I’m happy and Idgaf about him. and sometimes he’s stuck in my miiind -.- gaaay. Anywaaays. School’s in 10 days [: woo hoo.
An.Do.Ca.
): I feel stupid thinking of ^ But it’s so hard not to.. it makes me sad, how shit ended between us.. It was on bad terms. Fuuuck.. I wish that he’d just text me. How can he tell me he misses then the next thing you know we aren’t talking.. ):
Sooo..
I got paid friday. $285.08. Taxes deducted like $31. Haha. Nooootttt bad. Anywayyys. I worked yesterday and I work today, tomorrow, and tuesday. Ten more days till school.. I miss talking to him ): We haven’t talked since whaaat Wednesday or Thursday. I must admit, I miss getting texts from him. It’s hard to get him outta my mind. But he’s just like posted there.. Aha. I try...
What's the point?
Of me being angry?.. I don’t benefit from being angry. It’s just an emotion. Why do I even bother? I’m too nice sometimes.. it sucks. I can’t believe how passive I am when it comes to him, it’s ridiculous.. fuck it. again.
When....
I’m pissed off, I say a lot of shit out of anger. and end up regretting it. That is exactly why I do not want to say anything right now, especially to him. Cuhs I will fucking go off on him. Fuck you, asshole.
I do not.
Want to vent right now. But I will tomorrow. I’m too fuckin annoyed. Fuck you.
Mallllll.
Today [: Ebony’s whispering in my ear. hahah fuckin homo [: Welll Ros, Eb, Britney and I are boutta go to the mall and shopppp! [: I’m gonna buy a Hello Kitty Backpack, and Ebony’s tryna buy a Bellybutton ring, and some cute shirts. I’m fuckin texting a lot today and I didn’t bring my fuckin charger. This fuckin sucks, I hope my phone doesn’t dieee ]:
[:
My days have been getting better. I guess you can say. I talked to ….. today and he told me how he’s been feeling and shittt… But I don’t know whether to believe it or not. He hasn’t lied to me, so I don’t have a reason not to, but at the same time I kinda do.. It’s confusing. But whateversss. We learned almost the whole routine. My backhandsprings looked...
“If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the...”
– Nora Roberts (via littlemiss)
